A will is a dead giveaway

What is normal? Is it right to still love those who are with us physically, but not mentally? When is it time to let go? What is the normal way to grieve? What defines normal? This morning I opening the recreation center, and upon completing my assigned tasks i receive a phone call at 6am from my mother. I thought nothing of it since she is an early-bird anyways. I answered semi-groggy whipping the crust out of my eyes. She told me that my Grandma had pasted away at 2am this morning, but she didn't want to wake me. I apologized to her and my father and told them I love them. Once the line went dead tears swelled up in my eyes, and I called my close friend to come comfort me at work. I have never heard my Dad cry before which crushed me. Kyana showed up at work with a coffee to comfort me, but with in the time I called her and her five minute walk my eyes dried up. It wasn't that my heart wasn't still broken, but I don't know how to handle my emotions. I tend to cover up my excruciating sadness with crude humor. This has lasted me all day. Now I ask, what is normal? What is the normal way to grieve without inappropriate humor? People use the word normal to describe a common trend, but how do you go about your life being normal? I knew Cecelia Heimdal was dying for months now. The mix of Alzheimer, Sepsis, and pressure ulcers got the best of that little polish lady. She used to smell of moth balls and watch Church on the hell-ivision every Sunday. If i saw this coming why does it hurt so bad? Even though she had lost her mind years ago and constantly called me by the wrong name and repeated stories from the great depression. How could crying be normal? Does water spewing from your eyes really make people feel better? Does it comfort the lost of a long and wholesome life? If so, I am not normal.