Thursday, March 31, 2016

The Easter Bunny Problem

Many children get hyper around the month of March in anticipation of the Easter Bunny. I am not quite sure why, because what is so exciting about a giant bunny hiding eggs and candy in baskets around the house. My parents spiced it up and gave me presents, but i was never completely keen on the idea of a giant Easter Bunny breaking and entering in my house. Every year at the beginning of March my parents would dress me up in my Easter best and force me onto the lap of the mall bunny. Who knew what was under the urine stained matted down furry suite. The most memorable experience I had was at a mall in Wisconsin near Lake Geneva. I was only four years old. After getting my picture taken on the lap of a 7 foot bunny, my parents received the Polaroid. My father could not stop laughing and my mother looked disgusted. When I saw the picture, it ruined my childhood forever. In the bunnies mouth that man under the suits face appeared through the mesh. Being so young I thought the Easter bunny at the man under neath the suit. Years after I refused to sit on the bunnies lap without violently screaming and kicking. This is how the reoccurring dream came about. Every month of march, I would attempt to stay up all night everyday, so I didn't have to face the horrors of my dream state. If slumber did catch up to me, I would be haunted by the Satan Bunny. I was an inverse of Easter. Instead of hiding Easter baskets, my parents and I would have to hide. If the Satan Bunny found you he would kill you. It was pretty much hide and go die. My parents always died. My parents let the torment go on until fifth grade when I finally learned the truth. To this day every Easter my Mom and Dad compensate for their bad parenting with presents on Easter. This year I got $50 and a ton of peeps. Maybe if I milk it more next year they will give me $100. #BadParenting

Ode to Sodexo

The pizza is cold, and I am not sold, how can this possibly be food? I don't want to be rude, but chickpeas should not be served at every meal. This is not just how I feel, I not sure if what I am eating is veal, but I may just keel over and die. I think everything is fried and contains parts of flies, breakfast makes me want to cry and their bacon sits on a throne of lies. The ketchup and mustard have the consistency of custard what the fuck did i get myself into. Oh just my luck they claim that this green goop is roasted duck, and I might just up-chuck. I can't even trust the dessert their cake is more like a desert but advertised with an extra s. I'm not sure how I'm gaining weight I rarely fill or finish my plate. Ode to Sodexo.


I want to believe in something beyond this world, but logically i cannot. After reading Zarathustra, something stood out to me. In many different times and ways it was explained that those who preach life after death see life as suffering. They look at life as something you must endure until you reach your final destination after death. Though this is the view of one man who went crazy and died of syphilis, it made me think why should I keep wishing for something beyond this world, when this may very well be my elysium. Unfortunately this justifies generation x's slang term YOLO. For those who do not know what that means, Yolo is a poor acronym for you only live once. The idea of living life to its fullest is a romantic one; however, most people spend their life for preparing for after death than actually living it. As a kid, all I wanted in the world was to believe in magic. I thought that if I believed hard enough I would be able to become someone else and go other places. My young mind did not know this, but all of my fantasies were excuses. I waited for a miracle instead of going out and trying to change my life. Still let your kids watch fairy tales and avatar, and let them believe that if the put their mind to it they can bend water. They can. It is called jumping in puddles and splashing your friend at the beach. Don't wait around for magic, make it happen.

Looking Up

A few years ago my Dad and I went on a walk around a neighborhood river walk. My Dad is a man of few words, yet he always smiled and greeted everyone we would pass while walking. He asked me if I wanted to do an experiment, and of course I agreed. At the time science was my favorite class and I was excited that I might have the opportunity to impress my seemingly always disappointment father. He told me that every time someone would walk past me I should smile and say hi. He preached the opposite  of stranger danger. His hypothesis was that if I did not say hi first the stranger would not say anything and avoid eye contact. He was spot on. Every time i would greet someone they would return my salutations with a warm smile and hello. On the chance that I said nothing but looked at them, the would avoid eye contact. I am in college now, and I see almost the same people everyday. I live on a smaller campus, but there are still thousands of kids that attend. I still play this game, but instead of verbally greeting someone I just give them a smile and a wave. I am not sure if I look super friendly or like I am about to murder them, but I normally get a good response. Since I no longer use a verbal greeting, only the people who are looking up notice my actions. A majority of people my age use their phone as a scapegoat. I find myself doing it to. If I don't want to communicate with someone I find myself checking my phone and scrolling through instagram, but I find my day way more satisfying with human contact. Look up.

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Vitamin D Deficiency

This winter hasn't been harsh because of a large amount of snowfall. It has be harsh in the context of the bitter cold. In winter many people find themselves feeling blue, not from hypothermia, but from a lack of vitamin D. In the summer, this deficiency is not as pronounced as it is in the winter. Many people get their vitamin D from catching sun over the summer. They lack of this vitamin leaves people feeling depressed and more likely to look out the window of a moving car listening to sad music and pretending their life is a Nicolas Sparks worthy music video. Yesterday was one of the first days I was able to walk comfortably outside with a tank top on. Maybe no one wants to see me in one, but to bad. My cousin spent the night and her mom picked her up after she attended my psychology class. After she left it was so beautiful out that I didn't feel like "reclusing" myself in my dorm room as I usually do. I walked over to the only semi-decent food place on campus and decided to change up my order for once. I got a grilled cheese with mayo on tomato bread instead of french. I know that sounds wild. I also deviated from my normal schedule and instead of eating at the second from the right of the window, I took my sandwich outside. I walked until I found a picnic table. I sat their alone enjoying my sandwich and realized something. Though chemically I am unhappy due to a vitamin D deficiency, I am unhappy because of my schedule. Changing my predictable cycle to something new made me feel reborn, Even though I only changed the bread on my sandwhich and ate among the tree as opposed to my peer I felt enlightened. We are not the sun or a period. We are human, and not meant to cycle.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

My Research Question

The topic I am doing for my research paper is should assisted suicide/euthanasia  be legal? I chose this topic, because one thing I am currently concerned with is how much power the government has over how we live or don't live our lives. I would like to answer this question that euthanasia should be legal. I picked this question because I think that the government abuses its power and interrupts in daily life. This has been a recent concern, because over the summer on the way home from the mall with my friends my boyfriend got pulled over. I thought it was because he was speeding like usual, but no they pulled him over to give me a ticket for not wearing my seat belt. I took it off right in front of my house, and the cop practically pulled the car over into my driveway. She probably just wanted to meet her ticket quota for the month. Thanks Carol Stream. The point of my little rant is what gives the government the right to make me wear a seat belt? If i get into a crash I will get hurt. Is it not my choice or my freedom to decide what happens to my body. On top of that in Illinois it is illegal to kill yourself. Not only will someone end up with an emotional scar from trying to end their life, but they will also end up having to pay a large fine to the government, and no this money will not go toward our map grant. In order to do this topic, I will need to understand the law and why it is in place. I do not believe that the government has the right to say what you can do with your life. I will also look into whither or not this became a law do to the lack of separation of church and state. I would need to use sources in multiple fields such as medical, religion, philosophy, psychology and anthropology to get a better view from all areas.

Monday, March 14, 2016

One is not their disease

I met my best friend when I was two years old. It all began when my aunt took me to a terrible two tumbling class. We parted after those weeks of rolling around together, and later reconnected at a mommy and me cooking class. We were both late to the class, so we got to be partners, and once the class came to an end we parted once more. Once we reconnected in preschool we were inseparable.  We went to preschool and dance class together for two years, and after our preschool graduation we had to part again. My parents decided to move a town over, and we wouldn't go to the same school together again until high school. The distance did not stop us from growing up together. We did everything together from choir, to dance, to summer camp. She was always the blondest and most well dressed person you would ever meet. Her parents gave her everything and being her best friend I never saw her in the same outfit twice. When we got to high school all of my guy friends were crazy about her. Once sophomore year hit she began thinning out, but she was already skinny as is. She then told me she was a vegan, and I sat with her in lunch and she refused to eat in-front of anyone. I knew before she did. My once beautiful and stunning partner in crime was still beautiful, but only a skeleton of what she had once been. I remember one day shopping at pac-sun and her breaking down and crying that the size double zero was a little tight on her. When she exited the fitting room the pants where practically falling off of her. I felt like the worst best friend in the world, because I didn't know what to do. I could not even begin to image how she felt, when I consumed cheese from the gallon. I am glad to report she is back to her old self, but her disease did and still does consume her life. I learned the best thing you can do for someone with a disease is to never call them by that disease. Say she has anorexia instead of she's anorexic. We don't say someone with cancer is cancer. We say that they have cancer. Describing someone with their disease isn't  doing the person justice. It puts them in a position where they believe that they can't beat their disease.

Bear Arms

Do we still need the right to bear arms? The answer is no. People insist on the right to carry a gun, but for what? Protection? If no one has a gun, what are you protecting yourself from? A bear? No. Even hunting has become extremely restricted as many animals have become endangered. What is the need to hunt, if you could simply go to your neighborhood Jewel? People say that we don't have a gun problem, but what about the gang violence in Chicago, and the recent epidemic of mass shootings. On Saturday night, I was going clubbing with my friends. On the way to the club, we decided that we wanted McDonald's shamrock shakes. On the way in to the golden arches we got cat called by some black teenagers in a car with a sunroof. We ordered our meals at sat down, and a strange stocky Asian man approached us.  He had a very strange and removed sounding voice as he told us before we arrived that he almost had an altercation with the kids before we had arrived. The man clearly had something off about him. He said that the kids flipped him of and made threats toward him. He made a motion like he was loading a gun and he told us he would have pooped them in the ass if he had his gun. He stood there proud as if we should be applauding him. We had no idea how to reason, so we sat in silence as he eyed. He then said he wish he shot the kids. This is when I felt the need to say that he should not be shooting anyone and shouldn't have a gun. These are teenagers that are just goofing around, and would you feel safe having your kid on the street with a crazy man with the license to carry which he conveniently whipped out of his wallet to display o my friends and I. This churned my stomach to know that anyone as obviously mentally unstable as him could carry a gun. Later that night, a crazy guy hyped up on cocaine was being chased around the parking garage and the police subdued him with a taser as a last result. They did not shoot him, and I believe that no one should have the right to carry a gun besides a police officer and a solider at war.

Freedom of Speech

Recently, Trump was run out of Chicago by angry protesters that didn't want him preaching hate in our city. So my question is are those people any better than Trump? By not allowing Trump to speak at a rally they were taking away his freedom of speech. I am not saying that I agree with some of the things Trump says, but as an American doesn't everyone have the freedom to say what they want? People only care about their freedom of speech if it is something they want to hear. People are getting all of their information for the internet on candidates political agendas, and due to this they are forming their opinions based on political cartoons. If we were to take a look back a Trumps views before they were twisted into memes we would see that even though he is theatrical, they are not meant to be racist or illogical. He believes in protecting the second amendment. We should not put other countries needs before our own. We need to stop out sourcing jobs to other countries, when unemployment is so high in the US. Things like this do not make him a bad person, it just makes him a conservative. Though his reality star alter-ego is what we see on stage, his watered-down ideas do hit home for many things people have been feeling for a long time. The one topic I feel is necessary to talk about now is Trumps immigration policy. Many people are freaking out and calling him a racist for him saying that he wants to kick out illegal immigrants from the country. They call him a racist and a bigot, but they seem to forget that the immigrants are illegal, which means they are breaking the law. So, I think they should be removed from the country. LET TRUMP SPEAK!

Thursday, March 10, 2016

Reflection on explanatory synthesis

I am in the middle of a process of writing a paper that it both within and stepping out of the bonds of my domain. I chose to do it about political bias, because a recent pet peeve of mine has been people getting all of their information for this upcoming election on social media. Many people fail to see that all of the articles and pictures they read are filled with bias. Their whole purpose is to change one's opinion to get one to vote for who the sender wants you to. It is outside of my domain, because I am apolitical for the most part. I began my paper with the three topics I wanted to discuss, and after I decided that they were concrete I progressed to finding sources to back my claims. I then filled in all of the other information. It has been a difficult process with reviewing, because most of the time we are just asked to answer abstract questions about our peer paper, as opposed to correcting content and grammar. It is even more difficult, since we are all new to the APA style. One thing I wish I did was learn APA before I began the writing  process as opposed to the tedious process of transitioning in. I am well aware that my paper is flawed and I have a long way to go before the final draft will be turned in, but one concern I have about my peers papers is their papers are just long lists of quotes and paraphrases as opposed to having sources support their words. I always learn to start a quote or citation with who said it, why they are relevant to your topic and then you insert the quote. Following the quote, one needs to dissect their quotation and say what it means and how it supports their topic. I shall miserably continue my treacherous pursuit of learning APA, because in the near future, I have a nursing degree to work towards. After reviewing my final draft, and overseeing my original design plan and outline, I noticed I followed my design plan start to finish. I did spice it up a little, but I followed the order i intended. One thing that I wish I could have done differently on my papers is after describing how to defeat political bias I wanted to explain different views of the popular political candidates. My paper could have gone on for pages, but I would have liked to incorporate, in an unbiased way, the popular candidates views, so the reader could make a decision for themselves.

Monday, March 7, 2016

Wtf Bossypants?

I don't know how to say this but in modest ways, Tina Fey what the fuck? You have disappointed me. You have been my idol for along time, and I just spent $9 to see a movie that completely lacked your style. Over my spring break, my mother and I got tickets to go see Wiskey Tango Foxtrot. The movie in itself was entertaining, but I believe it was falsely advertised. By advertising something with Queen Fey you are practically saying that whatever the product is, it will be amazing. I would say she is one of the funniest women to ever roam the earth, but that's restricting and makes her sound like a dinosaur. I is the funniest out of all walks of life. I had an excerpt of her autobiography Bossypants to compete with on speech team. I made it all the way to sectionals with it. Ever since I have invested my time and money to see and buy everything she's ever been apart of. Whisky Tango Foxtrot showed that Tina Fey is a gifted actress and can thrive in many different roles, but it fails to mention that it is more serious. I will still own it when. It comes out to DVD, because Tina Fey is a goddess and the movie was great, but I wanted to see more of her witty  humor in this work. Crotch biscuits.

Having Older Parents

It seems that older parents put me at a disadvantage in life but in places that didn't really matter. If you are planning on having a kid in later years in life, I recommend trying to keep up with the styles and fads going on in their lives. Not only were all of my outfits replicas of the poorly dressed kids on the Barney show, but my social skills lacked too. My parents did not plan on having me so late in their lives, but i was not an accident. The adoption process takes forever and a half. My parents recieved me when I was first born, but they were in their mid-40ies. They raised me with morals of other generations. I was expected to grow up faster and be polite. Young adult my age were never taught to be polite, their parents skipped right past manners and leapt to sports. Being polite and more sociable to adults put me at a disadvantage with making friends. At a young age children normally make friends because their parent has friends with kids around that age; however, all of my mom's friends kids were already leaving for college by the time I was born. Even Though having older parents didn't give me great social skills, it did allow me to be polite and kind to adults. My parents dressed me in ruffles, bonnets, and overalls. Too this day their ideas about the world still make me laugh. My favorite is when my mom asks if I am going steady or dating around. I still try to explain to her that dating around pretty much means being a dirty slut in this generation. I love them so much and wouldn't change them for the world, but if your kid is an only expect them to turn out weird and like an adult in a child's body.

A reoccurring dream

It was a fall day, and I had my soccer team over for a slumber party. My parents were out to dinner, and the music was blasting. We heard a scratching noise coming from the door leading to the garage. We hesitantly went to investigate. The door creaked open, but we found nothing. I chillingly shook of the previous worry and we headed back to the party. The scratching became louder and more apparent than before. As we opened the door, nothing was there expect claw like marks on  the back of the big oak door. I slammed the door and wen to go check on my guest and every had disappeared. The scratching started again except for this time it was loud enough to be inside of the house. I fling the door open and the was still and absent presence lingering among me. The garage door began to clatter open and I saw the head lights of my parents car. They stumbled into my house in an intoxicated manner. Their merriment was startling and uncanny. When the scratches started up again my loopy parents followed me to the door. Standing there was a young girl with long black hair. black eyes and white tattered clothing tilting her head asking to come in. Without hesitation my invited her in and lead her to the kitchen table. I looked over my shoulder into my parlor and saw our hunter green carpet stained with the crimson blood of my friends. I went into a panic. The child infesting our house was laughing uncontrollably and asking my parents if they wanted to see a trick. She pulled out a screw driver and jammed it through her head. Purple blood trickled down her face as she laughed. I ran upstairs to grab my belongings, and not the way back down i had to chose the way to exit. I picked the eerie room that no one dare to go in because of the creep grandfather clock. There she sat. Laughing on the couch. I screamed where are my parents? Dead, and you're next. I sprinted out of the house to a near by park with her following close behind me. I ran up the stairs to the spiral slide and began to go down it as she was tailing me. The slide didn't end. Instead it twirled into a dungeon where i fell hard on the bricks. After hitting my head i awoke with her panting over me repeatedly gashing me with her screw driver. I opened my eyes, covered in cuts. I ran downstairs to find my mom. And i saw the girl sitting on the couch and laughing. I blinked and she was gone.

...And that's how i learned I had night terrors.